Opinion, Personal, Spirituality

Forgiving the Unforgivable

Maybe we shouldn’t be thinking of forgiveness as a permanent act. Maybe we recognise forgiving as a potentially impermanent state of being.

Some people may have noticed I hadn’t kept my promise of posting at least once a month. I didn’t contribute anything to this blog during March and tonight’s contribution may be something that’s forced, rather than flowing freely.

March might be the biggest month of any year for me. It’s an exciting time because of the spring equinox, which usually falls on my birthday. The equinox feels like the real beginning of the New Year. My brothers birthday also falls in March, though I don’t see a lot of him these days. My son’s birthday is just a few days before mine.

March also brings plenty of sad reminders. It marks the anniversary of the first death that ever affected me on a deep level, the death of “Auntie” Sarah, a close friend of my Aunt and mother.

March marks the anniversary of my wedding to my childhood sweetheart, the date of his disappearance a year later (which falls on my brother’s birthday), the date of his death and the date of his funeral (which was also the date of our first wedding anniversary). I didn’t attend the funeral, though I was the one to begin arranging it.

Yep, March is a big month and sometimes I wince when I notice the date and remember the significance of it.

So far, since his death in 2015, March has been that month where I feel like I’m most likely to be contacted by ex-in-laws. One year, my ex-sister-in-law appeared on my doorstep. This year it appears a friend of hers, “Kazza Evans”, had been sent to leave comments for me on my public Facebook posts instead. The sister-in-law currently has me blocked having already visited my profile to pester me last November.

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A comment left on my wall on the 4th March 2019

I’ll try to cut a very long story short.

My relationship with my son’s father was toxic, damaging, included abuse and yet I stayed in it for almost six years, marrying him right towards the end of the relationship.

I don’t need to explain or justify things. Anybody who knows how abusive relationships work, or how even non-abusive, but completely wrong-for-you relationships work completely understand how easily you can step into a marriage unconsciously, go through life on auto-pilot and ignore everything wrong with your life until you suddenly can’t ignore it any more.

It happens. It could happen to you. It’s happened to lots of people.

When I began to deconstruct and end my marriage, I was open and honest about my reasons why. My ex-husband was well aware that I had a long list of complaints and issues with his behaviour, but that sex abuse topped the list. I’d said that now his behaviour was affecting our son negatively, I could no longer use the excuse that staying with him and continuing to suffer myself was best for our son.

In short, my ex knew all the reasons the relationship was ending and he knew that I did not under any circumstances consent to him touching me. Yet the time between me first speaking my truth and him finally leaving our home spanned five months, forcing me to spend another Christmas with him and giving him plenty more chances to change his ways or do something to fix things.

He had more chances than he deserved. And he assaulted me twice more in those five months, as well as continuing other behaviours on my list of complaints.

I was as benevolent as I could be, for as long as I could be, because I cared about him despite everything. I never even saw him as a horrible, vindictive man until the weeks leading up to his death, when I decided perhaps I’d been looking at him through rose-tinted glasses for most of my life.

That man was a rapist and I didn’t even get mad or hate him until the very end, after I’d kicked him out and he started doing things like making false reports against me to child protection services and coming into my home uninvited, going through my things, tearing up my clothes and reading my private conversations with people on my computer.

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A comment from my ex-sister-in-law left under one of my blog shares on Facebook, in November 2018

So, he abused me. He then began tormenting me after he left my home. Then he, I suppose after his mental health really declined, rather selfishly took his own life.

As a Mental Health First Aider and someone interested in supporting people with their mental health, I’m not supposed to say suicide is selfish. The subject came up during training. We discussed suicide and the psychologist leading the training sympathetically addressed all people who have committed suicide as “victims”.

I was triggered, of course, and had to remind the psychologist and the rest of the class that infamous serial killer Fred West took his own life in prison. In fact, lots of abusers, rapists and killers have taken their own lives once they no longer have the control they are used to (consider it one final act of taking control) and thanks to my personal experience with my own abusers suicide, I can safely say some (if not all) suicides are fucking selfish.

The psychologist had tears in her eyes, as she quietly agreed that I made a very good point.

My ex took his own life, but before his body had even been found I was being accused of murdering him. According to ex-in-laws, I either killed him through the method of “covert psychological murder”, suggesting that I’m the one that abused him, or I killed him with voodoo dolls and witchcraft.

The claims about witchcraft didn’t come out of nowhere. I make no secret of the fact I’ve always been called a witch my whole life, but one of the lesser known facts of this whole sorry story is that actually, in the weeks leading up to my exes death, when he was causing me a lot of trouble and I began to really feel the effects of the trauma I’d been going through, I’d been confiding in my friend Nate on Skype about the whole ordeal.

Nate is a practising witch and shaman from the US, and he was so horrified by my story, he suggested I try to tackle my issues with my ex through magical methods. He was so angered that I had been abused, he said that my ex should and could be killed, with magic. He began suggesting various Gods and demons that could be summoned. I wasn’t sure what to think, and told Nate that I couldn’t kill anybody.

Not only was I not even convinced or sure that what Nate was suggesting is even possible, but I just did not feel that it was morally right to go around killing people, by any methods.

This was a private conversation on my private home laptop, that my ex-husband (or someone else coming into my home on his behalf) had read. Whether they read the whole conversation or not, I don’t know, but for all those whom ever wondered why these bizarre claims are being made, this is it. Someone genuinely suggested killing my ex with witchcraft, and it wasn’t even me! And my ex had to come into my house uninvited and go through my stuff to even know about it.

I’m amazed my ex-in-laws and anybody else involved feel like the good guys in this story. I spent weeks clutching police alarms, refusing to sleep, terrified because even after his death, people were still using his key to come into my house until the locks were changed. One of my neighbours, who was fond of my ex and his brothers, was trying to convince me I was actually being haunted by my ex, so I had obviously strong reasons to suspect that even he was involved in this campaign of torment.

How did these people convince themselves I am the bad guy in this story?

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This screenshot is essentially proof that people were coming into my home using my exes spare key following my exes death. The photo mentioned, which was in Trudi’s possession, was left in my kitchen one afternoon in April 2015.

I had to continue to live in my ex-marital home for three years, with that suspicious neighbour always just across the street. I spent most of that time terrified and not knowing who I could trust, because people right on my doorstep seemed to believe my ex-in-laws instead of me.

It didn’t matter that I’d had all the proof in the world and my ex had been having to manipulate situations and evidence to try to make me look bad. Didn’t matter that I was given Legal Aid to fight him in court the exact same week the BBC ran a story explaining domestic abuse victims weren’t being granted Legal Aid because most of them couldn’t provide sufficient evidence they were victims.

I want to add that as well as very publicly being accused of abusing and murdering my abuser, repeatedly, I’ve also been accused of having affairs and “posting my tits all over the Internet”. I was accused of having Antisocial Personality Disorder, and being a criminal, drug addict and alcoholic too!

My ex-husband cheated on me several times, including on my 23rd birthday with my brothers long-term girlfriend and childhood sweetheart whereas I’ve never cheated on anybody.  I very rarely drink, am most certainly not a drug addict and do not have Antisocial Personality Disorder, and thanks to the claims made about me in 2015, had to prove all of these things in court a little later that year.

Leaving the ex was the hardest thing I ever did. It should’ve meant the end of my torment and troubles, but instead it carried on or began popping back up here and there out of nowhere, every time I thought I closed that horrible chapter of my life and moved on.

Yes, just when I think I’ve came to terms with it all, forgiven and tried to see things from everyone else’s point of view, I’m called a murderer and an adulterer whose naked all over the Internet again and I feel a mixture of rage and sickness so deep in my core that in the past it’s made me physically and emotionally ill for a prolonged period.

I suppose I didn’t forgive yet, even though I keep on trying. I don’t know if I ever can.

My ex and his siblings had a negligent, abusive childhood. My ex-sister-in-law is one of the most unstable, unwell people I’ve ever met, thanks to her unstable upbringing and I try to remind myself they are or were the way they are or were, because they hadn’t had very good lives. I try to remember my ex lied to everybody about our split and relationship and it’s just easier for some people to portray me as evil than it is to accept the truth.

It’s easier for my ex-sister-in-law to blame me for his suicide, than consider the fact that the day he ran away, he was begging me to take him back while she bombarded him with something like 50 text messages. The messages came one after the other, despite his lack of response and included a threat to falsely report him to the Department of Work and Pensions for benefit fraud.

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Our last conversation is not a pleasant read, but at no point does he deny the abuse and instead apologises a number of times for “doing wrong”. He deleted the conversation from his own phone before taking his life.

One of the last things my ex screamed down the phone to me was “I can’t go back to Trudi’s, she doesn’t want me there. Please let me come home.”

I said no. I was not responsible for the life or death of the man I had given chance after chance. I spent years spineless, so I could bend as far over backwards for him as possible. He dominated and controlled every aspect of my life.

I can’t be sorry for taking my life back, and a lot of people should feel sorry and ashamed for their behaviour towards me.

I’m supposed to forgive everyone that’s ever wronged me, or hurt me, because that’s what Jesus or Buddha would do. That’s the suggestion made in just about every spiritual circle and what every spiritual healer or life coach will tell you. I wont be able to be happy, have a good life or attract the right things into my life if I hold onto anger over the past and towards people.

Apparently.

But am I really “holding onto anger” though, or do I keep letting go of it repeatedly? Isn’t it only stirred up again whenever I have to recall these events I really don’t want to talk about any more? Aren’t I simply feeling completely justifiable feelings when I have to read another post about me being a murderer on the Internet?

Am I just not reacting as if a bullet has hit me, when someone has pulled the trigger? Is this not completely normal and human?

Am I really failing to forgive all of the time, or do I succeed in my attempts at forgiveness sometimes? Aren’t I only unforgiving sometimes, but forgiving at all other times? Why is that not good enough?

Am I not absolutely fine, in the here and now, until somebody makes my past the now, again? Do I not accept everything? Have I not used these events as an opportunity for amazing personal growth? Don’t I even find myself able to empathise with those causing me hurt? Don’t I only sometimes suffer with bad feelings that make me feel bad?

Aren’t thoughts and feelings transient things?

Isn’t it enough that I am spending time mastering awareness and observation of my feelings, instead of allowing myself to become my feelings?

We cannot insist that a patient forgives someone who has deeply, and forever, harmed them. And, we certainly do not want to make our patients feel guilty because they cannot do something superhuman (forgive the unforgivable).

~ Mark Banschick M.D.
Psychology Today

I think maybe I do forgive, when I’m in a forgiving state, or perhaps not thinking about any of this at all. And I think maybe I don’t forgive when I’ve been triggered and am clearly in an unforgiving state. Seems pretty fucking straightforward to me. Seems like all that stuff I read about needing to forgive is just a load of unreasonable crap that doesn’t really take real life and how it works into account. But maybe I’m wrong.

Maybe the spiritual pressure to forgive is not at all unreasonable and the human mission genuinely is to become superhuman and stop feeling pain when somebody hits you.

Opinion, Spirituality

Are We Blocking Spiritualists From Their True Purpose?

What do terms like lightworker and healer mean to you? Are lightworkers and healers restricted to roles such as Reiki practitioners, mediums and so on?

Supposing now, everyone does have a ‘life purpose’ and a path they are supposed to follow. The first people to believe this are usually spiritualists and religious people. But are we blocking spiritualists from their true purpose by perpetuating stereotypical ideas about ‘raising vibrations’?

In the spiritual community, especially a large online one, like a large Facebook group, we can see thousands of people that feel it is their life purpose to raise the vibrations of the planet.

Lot’s of people feel they’re lightworkers and empaths. These ideas come up repeatedly in the community and these individuals seem to tend to make the decision to devote their life to things such as energy healing, after taking a couple of days training a few times.

I repeatedly see the idea that now they are spiritual and awakening, they must do what everyone else seems to be doing and that’s either building a career in the “spiritual sector” or building rapport as a hobbyist medium or preconceived spiritually approved profession or activity. Even I am using those relevant skills more often, or gaining new ones.

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Why am I, personally, continuing to gain experience with various healing or therapy modalities and studying psychology?

Because helping and healing and a natural understanding of people has dominated my life since I was a child. As a witch, I’ve been working with energy as far back as I can remember and I first took counselling training aged 12, because my teachers at school thought I’d be good at it.

Do I think it’s what I’m supposed to do, really, with my whole life?

Actually, no, and I’ll explain why in a minute.

Do you not wonder if stereotypical ideas about lightworking and how to raise the vibrations of the planet are limiting people?

I do.

You see, people who heal, who share light, who guide and who teach are not actually limited to a few professions or activities. These guides and healers can come in the form of the slightly more obvious charity worker, or the less obvious musician. They can be lawyers. They can be unemployed. They can have seemingly no “special” abilities at all, but their actions and choices in life serve to raise vibrations, heal and spread light.

It’s suggested your life purpose is tied to the things that truly make your soul sing. For some people that’s rock climbing or parachuting! I think, among the spiritual community people can be inclined to disregard the things that bring them the most joy if it’s an activity that doesn’t fit the preconceived ideas about being a spiritual person.

My entire life may have seemed to be pulling me in the direction of therapist and spiritual truth seeker, but a role as a psychologist, a therapist or healer actually seems to be secondary when I consider what truly makes my heart sing. My biggest passions are with creative and performance arts and always have been. If your purpose lies in your biggest passions, my primary purpose is to write and create.

I have a therapist of my own and she very quickly picked up on the things that make my heart and soul sing, because of the way my demeanour changed when I began to talk about it. When I spoke of writing poetry and my latest ideas for a fiction story, I began to “light up” and this in turn lifted my therapist.

And all my life, all I have been hearing is “you should write a book” as well as “you’d make a great counsellor”. I had so many small successes in writing and creative arts growing up, everyone was pretty sure that’s what I’d do with my life. When I was younger I used to hear a lot of people say “you should be an actress or comedian” too, as I very much enjoyed stage performance and entertaining the people around me.

When I talk about music, watching bands play live and how I used to write my own music, I “light up”. When I think about painting, I get excited. It’s probably not too unusual, as I think we all probably have an inherent (but possibly dormant) desire to make like a God and create, but creativity becomes secondary or completely forgotten in life because of the necessity to devote much of our lives to earning money to survive.

In the spiritual community, cold readers are rife. People lacking in the abilities necessary for the things they claim to be able to do are rife. It leaves me feeling that stereotypical ideas about spirituality and purpose are blocking people from going out and discovering the things they really should be doing. I’m talking about the things that make your heart sing so loud, you can hear it ringing in your ears and everybody around you can see that you’re glowing.

Yes, trying to help others to heal feels nice and like a perfectly purposeful thing to do, but many might be better off using their free time to try things like rock climbing, joining a choir or knitting club. Honestly, it might sound silly, but it’s easier to raise the vibrations of yourself and everyone around you when you’re so happy you’re lit up like a Christmas tree than it is to try to wedge yourself into the shoes (or sandals) of healers like Jesus Christ.

Yes, there’s more than just a few ways to help and heal people. There’s more than a few ways to light up this world.

It may be some people are missing out on their true purpose, or what would really make them and others around them happy, because they have been misguided by the common idea in the community that everyone’s life purpose is to be an energy healer or professional spiritualist of some sort. It’s time to get real and recognise if it’s your primary purpose, secondary purpose or not really meant for you at all.

You might be working a “normal” day job, and using your free time to give people tarot readings on the Internet, when you’re supposed to be playing for your local football team. Some people have found what I’m saying to be upsetting, but I ask them to consider why they are really upset about this.

Think of all the things we’d lose, if everybody on the planet quit their jobs to become a Reiki practitioner tomorrow because that sounds like the right thing for a spiritually woke person to do. I dread to think!

If everyone does have a purpose in life and a path they are supposed to follow – if everyone has things that they are supposed to do – don’t you think it’s a little bizarre that in the spiritual communities, everybody has decided their purpose and strengths are exactly the same things?

Opinion, Review

5 Things I Discovered Taking Part in The Energy Alignment Method’s 5 Day’s to Flow

The magic of EAM is that it enables you to shift energy, let go of repetitive thoughts, and overwhelming emotions. It helps you to release physical or emotional pain, negative feelings, painful memories and traumatic experiences to be free from stress, anxiety, and feeling overwhelmed.

My Facebook feed is always inundated with ads by coaches, from spiritual to general life coaching, trying to sell me their services, most of which, I ignore. However, scrolling through recently I spotted a post about The Energy Alignment Method, inviting me to participate in a free study, 5 Days To Flow.

The study introduces participants to The Energy Alignment Method (EAM), designed by Yvette Taylor. The study is held in a private Facebook group over 5 units, which can be taken in 5 days or longer and is built on the premise of such concepts as The Law’s of Attraction and Vibration, Kinesiology and Eastern Spiritual practice among others. The method, if followed correctly, is suggested to change a person’s life for the better, making The Law of Attraction work for them and clearing your aura or personal energy field of negativity and blocks that essentially prevent you from living your best life.

But what is EAM, and what did I learn about the method and myself during the five day course?

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Image belongs to EAM

1. EAM is “energy work”

EAM relys on your subconscious mind knowing exactly where there are points of resistance and reversal (like blocks) in your energy field so that you may release them. These points of resistance and reversal may have been created at any point in your life, but particularly in childhood and even, allegedly, in past lives you do not consciously remember.

Using a technique known as The Sway, a method in Kinesiology, participants are invited to ask their bodies to help them locate energy blocks, so that they can begin the process of releasing them.

In EAM, areas of your life are broken down into ten specific areas, for example, physical health, relationships and your thoughts and beliefs. During the short study, participants are invited to locate reversal or resistance in their energy by focusing on one of the simpler areas, with relationships suggested as the last area you would focus on as it takes being aligned in all other areas to work on your relationships.

An example of this might be focusing on your thoughts and beliefs surrounding your job, e.g. you would determine using The Sway if you feel resistance towards going to work and, if yes, you’d then begin to work on the process of release.

I discovered that I didn’t quite trust EAM, or The Sway and quickly grew frustrated with the process, despite my initial interest.

2. Administration might not be paying attention

For the purposes of the study, participants are invited to leave their comments and questions about each unit in the specific threads where each unit is found. If you decide to make your own post asking questions or making comments, it’s likely admin will respond, but they will suggest you leave your comments in the appropriate thread.

However, they are not responding to comments and questions in the threads, causing me to eventually make my own post in the group asking for help. I was told to post in the appropriate thread and explained that I had been, but administration weren’t providing feedback or answering questions and the administrator in question quickly went and located my previous post and responded. This didn’t make a difference for all of the other unanswered questions left by everybody else and I continued to get no responses on any other comment I’d made in the appropriate place.

I discovered that without support of an EAM mentor, you can’t possibly clear up any confusion you may have about the process and I begin to grow frustrated and even more distrustful.

3. The release process is…

After locating an apparent block in your energy, the release process method is simple, though it may not work the first time and you may have to keep doing it, or, I think (?), find another block that is preventing the release process from working. The release process is simply stating, three times in a row, that you are now ready to release the block, e.g. “I am ready to release this black cloud from my energy.” etc.

So, the release process is simply saying words with the intent of releasing negative energy until The Sway confirms your attempts have been successful. There is some talk of positive affirmations not being enough, because they’re just words, but then again, read about The Law of Vibration and positive affirmations and thinking are supposed to be quite handy in raising your vibration.

Either way, a witch knows that intent and belief matters, so whatever the words, I tried to say them with some feeling, just as I do so with positive affirmations.

While working on myself, I came to a standstill when I was being told by “The Sway” I was failing to release some negative thoughts and beliefs on a certain subject. I had questions and needed them answered, but decided not to pursue the mentors beyond posting where I was told to. I didn’t get my answers, so eventually moved on to the next steps, beginning to look forward to the end of the study so I could forget about EAM.

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

4. EAM is apparently working for some people

I saw a great number of positive comments and feedback from people and I’m aware that I was actually a participant of EAM’s second study, the first of which had apparently gone quite well. Yvette Taylor hopes that through the results of the study she can prove the method works and get EAM all over the world presumably.

I, however, felt that the only way I’d ever know if EAM is a method that really works is if I were to pay a lot of money to get on the EAM program, supported by a mentor. It’s absolutely not something I’m prepared to do. I hoped that I was being positively discerning and not wrongly sceptical, but the word “convoluted” kept springing to mind.

The main website states: industry leaders are already saying is “The Fastest Method For Getting In Flow”.

I disagreed.

I thought to myself “but there are easier ways” and funnily enough, The Sway confirmed this. The Sway confirmed I could clear my energy using other methods. The Sway confirmed I already had been doing a damn good job of clearing my own energy field. The Sway confirmed that I didn’t have to follow the Energy Alignment Method to reap the benefits of EAM. I believed all of this consciously and according to The Sway, my subconscious is in full of agreement.

“I’m powerful. I can do this any way I like.” I thought, quite arrogantly. And then, “That was quite arrogant, wasn’t it, April?

I suppose I learned I have a lot of faith in myself and that this may be misguided, in the sense I may have an exaggerated sense of my own abilities.

There was a lot I liked about EAM. I like the idea of trying to locate energy blocks and targeting them. I thought it was wonderful how it was apparently working out for some people. However, I also didn’t like EAM and I certainly grew annoyed about the lack of communication and support from mentors during the study. Perhaps I should have done the exact opposite of what I was advised and start giving my feedback and asking questions in my own posts.

5. The program costs?

I mentioned already that in order to get full support and really dive into EAM, I’d have to “pay a lot of money”.  The truth is, I can’t remember exactly how much the program costs, as I’ve misplaced old emails and trying to find the cost on the website is, for me, like trying to find a needle in a haystack. If I remember correctly though, you would pay a monthly fee for participation in a 10 month program. All I know is I determined it either wasn’t affordable or I just wasn’t sold on the method enough to pay for it.

Yvette seems happy, friendly and like a person living her dream right now. The fact that I walk away with a less than shining review and opinion of EAM so far is not something I do joyfully with the hope of condemning her business to ruin. In fact, I wish I had the time and money to give EAM a proper chance by taking on the program with extensive support from a mentor. Whether I think there are easier and faster ways or not, any form of therapeutic work or even spiritual and energy work is of interest to me and I’d like to understand it.

If EAM is genuinely working for people, then by all means, I hope that more people continue to discover it and get much more of it than I did, but for now, I’m going to continue working on self and life improvement through other methods.

Opinion

“Screw The Joker and Harley” – A Cog in The Wheel

I keep seeing those romanticised Joker and Harley memes on my feed. You know, the ones that portray their relationship as romantic and the kind of relationship people should want? It prompted me to save some images from the comics – mostly taken from other articles attempting to raise awareness of their relationship – and seeing as they’re just taking up space on my laptop, it’s time to share them.

 

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I wasn’t sure I’d ever write opinion pieces on this blog, but ultimately when my opinions are related to the health of society, it’s a good fit!

He’d kick me, but I’d kiss those boots!

~ Harley’s Poem

I got my Joker and Harley tattoo towards the end of an abusive relationship that followed an abusive relationship and preceded yet another abusive relationship. Every one of them had their own flavour and brand of toxicity.

I got my tattoo while I began the process of figuring stuff out, like what was “wrong” with me and what was “wrong” with him, or what is “wrong” with them, and other people out there. The “processing” process is not an overnight thing and more like years of work, relapsing and trial and error.

Every time I look at my tattoo, a symbol of abuse and “mad love” (false love), I think about what I’ve been through, what I’ve put people through and what I never want to tolerate ever again. I wonder if it’s all behind me, or if despite my intelligence, if I brave the world of dating again, I’m just going to mess up again.

I won a small poetry competition on Facebook a few years ago writing about Harley’s Stockholm syndrome, called Harley’s Poem. My friends on Facebook have likely seen it cropping up a few times over the years. The competition was ran by popular Joker cosplayer, Anthony Misiano. I’m a big fan!

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One of my old blog posts about Harley and Joker’s relationship in contrast to the respectful, loving relationship between Gomez and Morticia Addams seems to have influenced the creation of popular meme.

I can’t help but think, if you have a daughter or connections to young women, you ought to think twice before sharing a meme that romanticises domestic violence. However, I know going around demanding people rethink their behaviour and change their ways is a waste of time. Arguing with people over their posts on social media gets everybody nowhere. That’s why my focus has primarily been on me and being the change I want to see.

I wont be told what to say, or think or do, by anyone, but I try to consider the wider impact of my actions. I’ve had to make so many changes over the years because it turned out, some of my habits and behaviours were not the kind that encourages a better, fair society. I don’t just say “I don’t want to hurt anybody and I care about people.” I mean it, when I say it and if my behaviour does not reflect my core values, I realise it’s time to change it.

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When it comes to stories like The Joker and Quinn’s, you can respect the artists and writers, without allowing this media to become a harmful message. Respect the actors in the movies. Respect the story, but don’t twist the story. Tell it how it is!

I’ve always liked heroes and villains, horror movies and the dark stuff growing up. You’d have a hard job getting me to sit down to watch a Disney film at any stage of my life, but I know what I’m looking at when I’m looking at violence.

People don’t seem to want to take responsibility for the messages they put out there that impact people’s lives, but are deeply confused when they read yet another article in the news about another violent incident or murder. And yet, society and people has been under the microscope for a long time. It’s fairly obvious where problems lie, but less obvious sometimes is how we can do something about it when a lot of people would rather disagree and carry on as they were.

Many people have tricked themselves into believing one comment in the pub, or one social media share is a “harmless” act and disregard their connection to everyone and everything around them. You are a person in society, a cog in the wheel, and you play your role in deciding which way the wheel turns every single day.